I love my 535i (sport) but I really need help!

[Kahuhipa]

Everything about this car is amazing but are two things that are driving me nuts...

#1: The constant "chiming". I get in the car, put the key in the ignition and it immediately starts chiming SO loud I can't stand it. It's not just the door being open but also the seatbelt. Okay, so does it stop the second you close the door and put on your seat belt - of course not. The chime is in a series so it dings for a few more seconds. Then it does it again when you turn off the car unless you remove the key, take off your seatbelt, and then open the door. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Okay, every car does something similar but I've never been in a car that chimes this loud and doesn't stop the second you close the door or put on the belt. Oh, the key doesn't even have to be in the slot to start chiming, as long as the key comes close to the slot the symphony begins.

#2: If the chiming wasn't bad enough then I put the car in reverse and I have to listen to the ridiculously loud sensors from the front and the rear for about 45 seconds until I can get out of my driveway and well on my way. These are also the loudest I've ever heard in a car - so loud that they wake my kids up every time they're sleeping in the back and I reverse the car. In my wife's Audi Q7 you can change the tone and volume for the front and the back. I haven't found a way to do it in the 535. So now I'm out of my driveway and half deaf from the constant ringing. I put it into drive but does it stop? Of course not, the idrive screen remains frozen on the sensor readouts and it continues to beep with every car or mailbox I pass until I reach about 20 mph. Only then can I adjust the radio or do anything else in the iDrive.

PLEASE tell me there is a simple solution to this daily annoyance! I love everything about this car but the racket is driving me insane. I plan to ask for some kind of relief when I take it in for the first servicing but is there anything I can do before that?

HELP!!!

[sdbrandon]

I take it you did not get comfort access. With CA chiming only occurs when the fob is in the receptacle.

For the PDC, check with your dealer, the volume might be tunable via software.

[CJ9999]

I don't know about the chiming. My car has never had any chimes (from your description I'm glad!!).
You can turn the sensors off (and on) with the PDC button. In my car the button is in the centre console in front of the gear lever. When the sensors are on the button has a green LED on.

[bmrboy2008]

Check your manual. I believe you can adjust the chime volume via the iDrive.

[djfitter]

Everything about this car is amazing but are two things that are driving me nuts...

#1: The constant "chiming". I get in the car, put the key in the ignition and it immediately starts chiming SO loud I can't stand it. It's not just the door being open but also the seatbelt. Okay, so does it stop the second you close the door and put on your seat belt - of course not. The chime is in a series so it dings for a few more seconds. Then it does it again when you turn off the car unless you remove the key, take off your seatbelt, and then open the door. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Okay, every car does something similar but I've never been in a car that chimes this loud and doesn't stop the second you close the door or put on the belt. Oh, the key doesn't even have to be in the slot to start chiming, as long as the key comes close to the slot the symphony begins.

#2: If the chiming wasn't bad enough then I put the car in reverse and I have to listen to the ridiculously loud sensors from the front and the rear for about 45 seconds until I can get out of my driveway and well on my way. These are also the loudest I've ever heard in a car - so loud that they wake my kids up every time they're sleeping in the back and I reverse the car. In my wife's Audi Q7 you can change the tone and volume for the front and the back. I haven't found a way to do it in the 535. So now I'm out of my driveway and half deaf from the constant ringing. I put it into drive but does it stop? Of course not, the idrive screen remains frozen on the sensor readouts and it continues to beep with every car or mailbox I pass until I reach about 20 mph. Only then can I adjust the radio or do anything else in the iDrive.

PLEASE tell me there is a simple solution to this daily annoyance! I love everything about this car but the racket is driving me insane. I plan to ask for some kind of relief when I take it in for the first servicing but is there anything I can do before that?

HELP!!!

You can fix #1 by simply closing the door before putting in the key. Then if you put the key in, then the belt on, there are no door or seatbelt chimes at all when you start the car. Also I have noticed that the chime volume increases as necessary to make itself heard above the radio, at least with the speed limit alarm it does.
I don't have PDC so I can't comment on that. Also, if this is all you have to complain about with the car, WTF, get over it. :confused:

dj

[arh1000]

Hey Kahuhipa...I just just gotta say I agree with you 100% ... but the worst ^&^%%$# chime of all is the one when you dont where your seat belt. That friggin thing chimes for like 60 - 120 seconds...for goodness sakes...if I want to take a risk and not wear a belt...I am a big boy!

Anyway...I sure wish there was a way to turn off the damn seat belt chime. My guess is that no dealer will disable it due to liability concerns which just further infuriates me with all of this politically correct mamby pamby sissy bullshyte. Oh well...rant over...lol.

[djfitter]

Hey Kahuhipa...I just just gotta say I agree with you 100% ... but the worst ^&^%%$# chime of all is the one when you dont where your seat belt. That friggin thing chimes for like 60 - 120 seconds...for goodness sakes...if I want to take a risk and not wear a belt...I am a big boy!

Anyway...I sure wish there was a way to turn off the damn seat belt chime. My guess is that no dealer will disable it due to liability concerns which just further infuriates me with all of this politically correct mamby pamby sissy bullshyte. Oh well...rant over...lol.

If you want to be dumb enough to drive without a seatbelt, don't complain about what you get when you do. Things like seatbelt chimes, a dramatic ejection through the windshield, or death just to name a few. :yikes:

dj

[arh1000]

Oh geez djfitter...grow up...i was not complaining about anything but the damn chime...open your eyes and read the post again before you comment...I said I am a big boy because i can live the consequences of my own actions thank you very much. I also dont feel the need to lecture others unlike you.

[djfitter]

Oh geez djfitter...grow up...i was not complaining about anything but the damn chime...open your eyes and read the post again before you comment...I said I am a big boy because i can live the consequences of my own actions thank you very much. I also dont feel the need to lecture others unlike you.

I am all grown up, thank you. I seems to me I just pointed out the absurdity of driving without a seatbelt.
And you didn't just complain about the 'damn chime', you went on to complain about having to wear a seatbelt and "all of this politically correct mamby pamby sissy bullshyte".
Also, I did read the post before commenting, which appears to be more than you did. In my post #5, I at least addressed his question with a usable answer. :dunno:
And apparently you can't tell the difference between a lecture and a comment. I never lectured on the wearing of a seatbelt, I commented on the stupidity of not wearing one. :p

dj

[Kahuhipa]

You can fix #1 by simply closing the door before putting in the key. Then if you put the key in, then the belt on, there are no door or seatbelt chimes at all when you start the car. Also I have noticed that the chime volume increases as necessary to make itself heard above the radio, at least with the speed limit alarm it does.
I don't have PDC so I can't comment on that. Also, if this is all you have to complain about with the car, WTF, get over it. :confused:

dj
Brilliant. Come on. If I'm getting into a 110 degree car the last thing I want to do is sit down, buckle up, close the door.... then fish for the key to start the car. Don't be an idiot.

This is the loudest damn chime of any car I've ever had, my neighbors can hear it across the street. It's the first impression I have getting into the car and the last impression when exiting. I haven't noticed any difference in the volume whether my stereo is on or not.

BTW, why are you so pissed off that I hate the chime (i.e. "WTF, get over it")?

[Kahuhipa]

Check your manual. I believe you can adjust the chime volume via the iDrive.
bmrboy2008, I've searched everywhere in iDrive and no luck. I even called the dealer (across the Pacific Ocean) and he couldn't find a solution either. I'm surprised that iDrive has less than half of the options that Audi's MMI gives the owner to customize their car.

[Kahuhipa]

I don't know about the chiming. My car has never had any chimes (from your description I'm glad!!).
You can turn the sensors off (and on) with the PDC button. In my car the button is in the centre console in front of the gear lever. When the sensors are on the button has a green LED on.
Mine has that button too. I like using PDC , I just want to lower the volume on the racket of beeping and then I want it to turn itself off the second I put it in Drive like most other cars.

[Kahuhipa]

I take it you did not get comfort access. With CA chiming only occurs when the fob is in the receptacle.

For the PDC, check with your dealer, the volume might be tunable via software.
Nope, it wasn't available anywhere on the West Coast in combination with the other options I wanted - now I really wish I had it! I'm certainly going to ask the dealer about the PDC volume, thanks!

[Kahuhipa]

I am all grown up, thank you. I seems to me I just pointed out the absurdity of driving without a seatbelt.
And you didn't just complain about the 'damn chime', you went on to complain about having to wear a seatbelt and "all of this politically correct mamby pamby sissy bullshyte".
Also, I did read the post before commenting, which appears to be more than you did. In my post #5, I at least addressed his question with a usable answer. :dunno:
And apparently you can't tell the difference between a lecture and a comment. I never lectured on the wearing of a seatbelt, I commented on the stupidity of not wearing one. :p

dj
djfitter, your comments here have been worthless. Feel free to excuse yourself from the thread since you've brought nothing to it.

[djfitter]

djfitter, your comments here have been worthless. Feel free to excuse yourself from the thread since you've brought nothing to it.

Responses like this from a noobie do not elicit answers to future questions. Your comments to the worth of my answers only exposes your level of intelligence. I will choose to take my leave from your worthless thread. :p

dj

[Mysticblue325i]

I said I am a big boy because i can live the consequences of my own actions thank you very much.
Well, if you can live with the consequences of not wearing a seatbelt, then you can apparently live with the chime, which is................wait for it................a consequence.

Brilliant. Come on. If I'm getting into a 110 degree car the last thing I want to do is sit down, buckle up, close the door.... then fish for the key to start the car. Don't be an idiot.
djfitter, your comments here have been worthless.
Wow, good luck getting help with all that hostility.:(

[AzNMpower32]

The incessant chiming on modern BMWs is ridiculous.

My '04 X3 never chimes. Want to ignore the seat belt? Fine. Low fuel? Go ahead. Service past due? No problemo. Key in ignition? Not a peep.

Y'all with iDrive are lucky. The 335i loaner with sat nav had the semi-decent chime y'all 5 owners get, but our 325i non-sat nav has an irritating "bong!" for everything. If you run low on fuel, it dings every 2 minutes or so, AND when you shut the engine off. Overdue for service? BONG!! Leaving the car in Neutral w/o P brake, unbuckling the seat belt, leaving the key in, opening the door, heck even using the roadside parking lamp feature...........they all elicit a handful of BONG sounds at you. Seriously, BMW.......I know how to operate a vehicle. I don't need idiot chimes.

I heard the next generation 3-series has a warning chime if you forget to comb your hair.

[arh1000]

LOL...thanks AzNMpower32 and Kahuhipa for keeping it real...geez...all I am doing is agreeing with you both the ridiculous incessant beeping, bonging, and chiming is absurd. Don't get me wrong...I truly truly love my 545i but all of my 3 previous BMWs never made this much damn noise!

And please telling someone the obvious (that not wearing is more dangerous) is lecturing...**** is it actually bordering on preaching...and no one wants to hear that crap.

Oh, and I love djfitter's vailed threat..."Responses like this from a noobie do not elicit answers to future questions" is childish and passive aggressive which only furthers my point of being mamby pamby PC...puhlease!!!

[danna]

Indeed - the only thing more annoying than the damn chime is the incessant chiming-in on EVERY related thread by people who want to give seat belt lectures. PAY ATTENTION: nobody said anything about not wearing their seatbelts...just that the chime is deafening.

FWIW, my replacement '05 545i has a quieter chime than the '05 545i I totalled (wearing my seatbelt, thank you very much.) That's weird for the exact same model.

BTW, djfitter, do you really use your speed limit alarm?

[Billd104]

:wow: All this hubbub over chimes... where oh where are we headed?? :D

I believe the chime volume can be adjusted by a BMW dealer when the vehicle is in for service. The settings are stored in the CKM (Car Key Memory) and can't be adjusted otherwise. :thumbup:

[Interested]

I wear my seatbelt 100% of the time, and am also annoyed with the chimes/bongs. My keys are always in the car (in the garage), so when I open the door, it beep, beep, beeps. Then I start the car, and it beep, beep, beeps. The I say: "would you STFU"!

I understand the beeping when you leave the key in the ignition and the door is open. My suggestion would be that it would only beep when the car is put in gear w/o seat belt fastened.

I start the car, and get settled (plug in MP3 player, turn on seat warmers, fasten seat belt, etc.) while the car warms up, then drive away. The whole time I am getting settled, I have listen to the incessant beeping. It is a PITA getting settled w/ a seatbelt on.

[AzNMpower32]

That weird that it happens on your '05 E46. In my '04 X3, if I leave the key in and open the door after driving, it beeps. However, if I open the door and stick the key in, it does NOT beep.

Maybe something went on between the '04 and '05 model years? The '05 X3s have a seat belt chime that is thankfully not present on my '04.

The E90 bongs at me if I forget to breathe out after 1.5 seconds.

[M550]

Finally BMW has put in so much electronics that someone is going insane. :rofl:

[dwulffusa]

I hate chimes as much as the next guy, after 20odd years of driving, 99% of people are habitual enough to automatically close the door when they get in, reach for the seatbelt before starting up and when exiting - realize they they cant lock the car without the key....

So, no point in getting all worked up, just go up to a techi, and offer him $100 to come over to your house and remove the buzzer all together.
A serious problem will always light up on the instrumentation and that is good enough for me.

[Interested]

:wow: All this hubbub over chimes... where oh where are we headed?? :D

I believe the chime volume can be adjusted by a BMW dealer when the vehicle is in for service. The settings are stored in the CKM (Car Key Memory) and can't be adjusted otherwise. :thumbup:

It's not that it is a major flaw in the driving mechanics of the car. It is an annoyance (like a mosquito flying around your ear at night). Life has enough annoyances already, and I think people are making a big deal about it because they feel it doesn't have to be that way (especially in the Ultimate Driving Machine).

You just want to find the plug on this chime and yank it out of the wall. We are saying: "I know how to drive, and I am smart enough to fasten my seatbelt. Quit yelling at me!"

:rofl:

[The_Missile]

If you want to be dumb enough to drive without a seatbelt, don't complain about what you get when you do. Things like seatbelt chimes, a dramatic ejection through the windshield, or death just to name a few. :yikes:

dj

+1

[vatkens]

Everything about this car is amazing but are two things that are driving me nuts...

#1: The constant "chiming". I get in the car, put the key in the ignition and it immediately starts chiming SO loud I can't stand it. It's not just the door being open but also the seatbelt. Okay, so does it stop the second you close the door and put on your seat belt - of course not. The chime is in a series so it dings for a few more seconds. Then it does it again when you turn off the car unless you remove the key, take off your seatbelt, and then open the door. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Okay, every car does something similar but I've never been in a car that chimes this loud and doesn't stop the second you close the door or put on the belt. Oh, the key doesn't even have to be in the slot to start chiming, as long as the key comes close to the slot the symphony begins.

#2: If the chiming wasn't bad enough then I put the car in reverse and I have to listen to the ridiculously loud sensors from the front and the rear for about 45 seconds until I can get out of my driveway and well on my way. These are also the loudest I've ever heard in a car - so loud that they wake my kids up every time they're sleeping in the back and I reverse the car. In my wife's Audi Q7 you can change the tone and volume for the front and the back. I haven't found a way to do it in the 535. So now I'm out of my driveway and half deaf from the constant ringing. I put it into drive but does it stop? Of course not, the idrive screen remains frozen on the sensor readouts and it continues to beep with every car or mailbox I pass until I reach about 20 mph. Only then can I adjust the radio or do anything else in the iDrive.

PLEASE tell me there is a simple solution to this daily annoyance! I love everything about this car but the racket is driving me insane. I plan to ask for some kind of relief when I take it in for the first servicing but is there anything I can do before that?

HELP!!!


I'm with BMW of North America, LLC. Here's some information about controlling warning tone volumes in your 535i (from page 88 of the Owner's Manual).

If you have any questions or need further assistance, please give us a call at 800-831-1117.

[arh1000]

Hi vatkens...thanks for the reference...but I dont believe that this is available for the 2005 545i is it? I cannot find it after searching my owners manual. Thanks.

[bbal]

Is single drive referring to CD/DVD drives? I don't have this option in my idrive. Wish I did.

[vatkens]

Hi vatkens...thanks for the reference...but I dont believe that this is available for the 2005 545i is it? I cannot find it after searching my owners manual. Thanks.

arh1000,

Unfortunately this adjustment option is only available in Model Year 2008 and forward for the 5 Series.