Great info Jamtuff, update
I checked my fluid level again and it is correct, just a trickle between 40-50C. I couldn't find any sign of fresh fluid around the pan seal, fill plug, drain plug, main seal, or transmission fluid cooler hoses, but I am still getting the smell.
Found out the hard way that the aluminum pan bolts won't take more than ~ 7 N-m, at least mine won't, and I managed to strip a couple. Mike Miller didn't realize the fasteners on this particular transmission were aluminum, and after I told him he agreed that not stripping the bolt heads is the way to go, so disregard the above torque recommendation and stick with 6-7 N-m.
I ordered some stainless steel M6x22 fasteners from McMaster-Carr to replace the aluminum ones. It's always important to use a torque wrench, even more if you go to this stronger bolt. I bet the reason the ZF engineers used the aluminum bolts is because they couldn't be overtorqued.
Any ideas where the fluid might be leaking from?
2001 330i Orient Blue