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Go Back   Bimmerfest - BMW Forums > BMW Model Discussions > 5 Series > E39 (1997 - 2003)

E39 (1997 - 2003)
The BMW 5-Series (E39 chassis) was introduced in the United States as a 1997 model year car and lasted until the 2004 when the E60 chassis was released. The United States saw several variations including the 525i, 528i, 530i and 540i. -- View the E39 Wiki

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  #1  
Old 02-22-2015, 12:18 PM
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JDeGraff89 JDeGraff89 is offline
Otto Zwei-Punkt-Null
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Can you think of any other utterly useless and stupid features.

Number one on my list of stupid features, Rain sensing windscreen wipers. Ok jacko, if you can't tell it is raining and that you need to turn on your wipers, you need to stay off the roads please.

Number two, Automatic headlamps. Again if you cannot tell that visiblitiy is poor due to darkening skies. Please stay off the road as your vision is impaired to an extent that should also knock you out of the breeding population. If you do not think you need your headlights in the rain because its day time.. Also stay off the road as your likely driving a white, silver, grey car/ truck / suv. And with out your lights on I will. Cut you off and you will T bone me all because I can't see your car when the rain is camoflauging it oh so well!..

Can you guys think of more useless features?
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  #2  
Old 02-22-2015, 12:23 PM
HolyToledo HolyToledo is offline
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I can't stand the daytime driving lights.
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  #3  
Old 02-22-2015, 12:26 PM
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JDeGraff89 JDeGraff89 is offline
Otto Zwei-Punkt-Null
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The halos? Or thhe high beam that's putting out a low beam setting? Neither of my E39s have had this feature active. Very strange.
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Current: 12/16/2002 530i Auto Titangrau/Standardscwarz

R.I.P. Otto, 04/17/97 - 02/02/15 You'll be missed my drunken Bavarian friend.

"Owning one of these cars is much like owning a two year old child. It's annoying most of the time, but if anyone tries to take it from you'll kill them." J. Clarkson.
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  #4  
Old 02-22-2015, 12:27 PM
HolyToledo HolyToledo is offline
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Yeah, the high beam bulbs that stay on during the day.
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  #5  
Old 02-22-2015, 01:21 PM
edjack edjack is offline
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CHMSL. Since everyone has one, it's ceased to be effective.
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  #6  
Old 02-22-2015, 01:34 PM
jieg jieg is offline
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My car does not have auto daytime driving lights; they are good for safety while on the highway.

The problem with some auto features is that they make our brains lazy.

I think the cup holders in the e39 is a stupid design
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  #7  
Old 02-22-2015, 01:45 PM
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JDeGraff89 JDeGraff89 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by edjack View Post
CHMSL. Since everyone has one, it's ceased to be effective.
Hmmm, never even think about those... So I'll have to say I agree by default.
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R.I.P. Otto, 04/17/97 - 02/02/15 You'll be missed my drunken Bavarian friend.

"Owning one of these cars is much like owning a two year old child. It's annoying most of the time, but if anyone tries to take it from you'll kill them." J. Clarkson.
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  #8  
Old 02-22-2015, 02:02 PM
computiNATEor computiNATEor is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JDeGraff89 View Post
Number one on my list of stupid features, Rain sensing windscreen wipers...



Number two, Automatic headlamps...

I actually really appreciate both features.

The rain-sensing windshield washers are convenient for SoCal weather, as our "rain" is generally very patchy; two miles away the sun is shining. It's no excuse for not paying attention, of course, but it's nice just the same. I appreciate it because when I'm stopped at a traffic signal, the speed of the washers decrease so as to annoy me less and make less noise.

I also appreciate the automatic headlamps because of the occasional freeway tunnel. Rather than remove my eyes from the road to flick the switch, I let the car take care of it. Also, the automatic day/night instrument cluster light brightness is nice.
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  #9  
Old 02-22-2015, 02:06 PM
MKJS MKJS is online now
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The "cup holder"... What were they thinking!!!
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  #10  
Old 02-22-2015, 02:13 PM
plmadding01e39 plmadding01e39 is online now
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I love GOOD rain sensing windshield wipers. Our E39's have excellent automatic wipers.

My 03' Lincoln Town Car had horrible rain sensing wipers. They always ran the wrong speed.
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  #11  
Old 02-22-2015, 02:59 PM
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chiefwej chiefwej is online now
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One person's stupid feature is another's pricesless "couldn't do without" feature. At least most all can be easily turned off or disabled. I could do with out the right mirror dipping when I put the car in reverse, especially since it never moves to a position that would actually let me see tha curb as I backed up.
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  #12  
Old 02-22-2015, 03:04 PM
edjack edjack is offline
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Flip the switch to the right side position; cancels the dip feature.
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  #13  
Old 02-22-2015, 03:04 PM
computiNATEor computiNATEor is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chiefwej View Post
One person's stupid feature is another's pricesless "couldn't do without" feature. At least most all can be easily turned off or disabled. I could do with out the right mirror dipping when I put the car in reverse, especially since it never moves to a position that would actually let me see tha curb as I backed up.

You may be able to adjust that using NCSExpert. If you want to disable it, simply flip your mirror adjustment selection switch to the passenger side.
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  #14  
Old 02-22-2015, 03:07 PM
computiNATEor computiNATEor is offline
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I have a strong dislike of the folding CD slot cover. How hard would it have been to put the CD slot above the MID display?
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  #15  
Old 02-22-2015, 03:21 PM
EconoBox EconoBox is offline
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Rain sensing wipers are a clever and useful as hell feature.

Why? It is for days with a SLIGHT drizzle
Not enough rain to keep the wipers on full time.
But just enough rain where you don't want to keep flicking the "wipe once" activator every 20 seconds.

That's what they're for.

Last edited by EconoBox; 02-22-2015 at 03:23 PM.
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  #16  
Old 02-22-2015, 03:53 PM
oldman67 oldman67 is offline
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how old are you?> Sound like a grumpy old man
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  #17  
Old 02-22-2015, 04:03 PM
MKJS MKJS is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by computiNATEor View Post
I have a strong dislike of the folding CD slot cover. How hard would it have been to put the CD slot above the MID display?
Still looking beautiful Nate. You and the shops did a GREAT job getting her going again.

doc
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  #18  
Old 02-22-2015, 04:03 PM
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Ah, I still find rain sensing wipers and automatic headlights useless. Is it that hard to hit the wiper lever?
As for the silver/gray/white car thing, that was the guy's excuse that hit our last E39... "Oh, I didn't see the car..." it was 8 in the morning on a clear day.
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  #19  
Old 02-22-2015, 04:05 PM
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QSilver7 QSilver7 is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MKJS View Post
The "cup holder"... What were they thinking!!!
They were thinking German culture...which has a different point of view as to the need for cupholders.

I wish I still had the Rounded article from back in the 90s that interviewed high up BMW brass about US buyers begging for them...and BMW brass throwing their hands in the air as to why. They could not understand why we wanted to drink & drive...but since we are a large & vocal market...along with other markets asking for them and other car manufacturers providing them...they compitulated.

Up until the 1995 e38...no BMWs ever had built-in cupholders...they were small & sadly designed accessories in prior generations...and no, these 1st built-in designs were just as pathetic as the previous accessory designs...just way over-engineered...but not designed for American's use & longer commutes or cross country trips where 44 oz Big Gulps are the norm...or daily Starbucks Coffee intake.

German culture is geared more to sitting down to relax & have a meal...rather than dine & dash...or dashboard dining. They also focus on the safety of dining while driving (think the high speed Autobahn) the 1st gen built-in cupholders in the e38/e39/e46 were dismal failures for American culture. The holders were geared more for holding 12 oz or smaller/thinner containers...as well as holding the drink while parked rather than on the move. Anyone not realizing this probably has a too familiar story of a spilt drink while turning or pulling off/out into traffic.

The 2nd/3rd/ & higher cup holder designs got progressively better. For example, the cupholders in my 06 X5 are great...not only the deep dual well front cupholders...but the rear ejecting cupholders are also deep enough to hold a large cup or drink without spilling the contents all over the console or floor.

Just my observations, experience, and info from e30/e32/e34/e38/e39/e53 ownership from 1986-present day.
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Last edited by QSilver7; 02-22-2015 at 04:10 PM.
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  #20  
Old 02-22-2015, 04:32 PM
computiNATEor computiNATEor is offline
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Originally Posted by MKJS View Post
Still looking beautiful Nate. You and the shops did a GREAT job getting her going again.



doc

Thanks doc!

Click image for larger version

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She's dirty from the rain right now, but I'm doing a full detail as I have time.
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  #21  
Old 02-22-2015, 06:51 PM
joekitch joekitch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JDeGraff89 View Post
Number one on my list of stupid features, Rain sensing windscreen wipers.

Number two, Automatic headlamps. ?
i'm going to come out in defense of both of these.

rain sensing wipers are nice in that its set it and forget it, its very useful for light rainfall where putting the wipers in normal wipe mode would be overkill, but you see need to occasionally blip the stalk to wipe away some water.
Just set the rain sensing wipers and dont worry about it at all

auto headlamps are similar. just leave it in auto and they tend to pretty smart about when to turn on, and you dont have to ever think about it.
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  #22  
Old 02-22-2015, 07:27 PM
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JDeGraff89 JDeGraff89 is offline
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My can holders work very well. All I ever drink on my way to work in the morning is my energy drink, which comes in a can, which is always held well by the factory can holder... I love it... and still think auto anything is stupid... driving is supposed to be an engaging activity. not some mindless humdrum..
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R.I.P. Otto, 04/17/97 - 02/02/15 You'll be missed my drunken Bavarian friend.

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  #23  
Old 02-22-2015, 07:38 PM
brc5 brc5 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JDeGraff89 View Post
Number one on my list of stupid features, Rain sensing windscreen wipers. Ok jacko, if you can't tell it is raining and that you need to turn on your wipers, you need to stay off the roads please.

Number two, Automatic headlamps. Again if you cannot tell that visiblitiy is poor due to darkening skies. Please stay off the road as your vision is impaired to an extent that should also knock you out of the breeding population. If you do not think you need your headlights in the rain because its day time.. Also stay off the road as your likely driving a white, silver, grey car/ truck / suv. And with out your lights on I will. Cut you off and you will T bone me all because I can't see your car when the rain is camoflauging it oh so well!..

Can you guys think of more useless features?
Both of these features are great, and when I'm in a car that doesn't have them, I'm annoyed - particularly rain sensing wipers. Rain is rarely constant -particularly so when travelling at speed when you're going in and out of showers. Having wipers that take care of that is one less thing to worry about and you can concentrate on driving.

Auto headlights are great in that they come on at a predetermined light level and automatically switch on in tunnels/carparks.

Stupid unnecessary features are auto-raising steering wheels and animated greetings that flash across LCD screens when you start, or annoying idrive 'don't use this screen when driving' confirmations. I even rented a POS that rotated the dials backwards every time you started the car, like it was full of Lucas electrics gremlins. Those are idiotic.
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  #24  
Old 02-23-2015, 03:53 AM
EconoBox EconoBox is offline
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Does the OP now understand what rain sensing wipers are for?

They are not "to remind you to turn on your wipers". Only an idiot would think that's what they're for.
They are the ultimate in real time INTERMITTENT wipers that can not be set to a fixed oscillation due to irregular distribution of rain water.

It is god damn brilliant engineering.
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  #25  
Old 02-23-2015, 09:06 AM
HolyToledo HolyToledo is offline
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I still find myself fiddling with the wiper stalk, even with the auto on.
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