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Fuse Help!

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I'm trying to figure out which fuses serve the various power outlets. BMW's "fuse map" is essentially the most useless piece of paper I've ever seen in my life. Egyptian Hieroglyphics are easier to decipher than this "diagram". And what manufacturer doesn't have a listing that states "Fuse 1 - ABS. Fuse 2 - Windshield washer fluid". I mean, who gives you an "Engine" pictogram and says "good luck, if there's anything out, check out the following SIXTEEN fuses. Have fun chief. Auf wiedersehen!" REALLY?

Here's the map, can anyone help?

if you're really interested, I am trying to figure out if any of the ports has a fuse greater than 15A.
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I seem to remember reading about a 25 amp fuse for the sound system. I am not sure if it was only for the premium sound or just M5 or what, but my feeble brain says I read it somewhere. Sorry I am not much help.
Poking fun at the pictograms, apparently my car has the following equipment:

A "Bong" (below the steering wheel, top left)

A square box that takes TWENTY fuses to run (directly below the "bong")

The possibility of having a convertible?? WTF? (Third column, 5th down)

The possibility of having a height adjustable suspension? (Third column, 4th down)

A very basic disconnect switch (third column, 11th down). Oh wait, might that be the sunroof?

Some kind of satellite (first column, 11th down)

A thermometer that takes 4 fuses to run, (first column, 13th down).

A snow making machine that takes 6 fuses to run (second column, second from bottom)

Something that is slipper when wet (second column, bottom)

A battery - (third column, second from bottom).
Great interpetation of the Hieroglyphics!

Back in college my car had a "Bong" as well. Back then this equipment was used a lot. Didn't know it was standard equipment on the F10 and needs no less than 4 fuses!
Other goofy notes:

According to column 1, row 7, the F10 can be equipped with a "4x4" option, with some sort of giant gear. Maybe the xDrive models should be renamed "Rubicon"? Or perhaps more suiting to the country of origin, the "Zugspitze" models.

According to column 2, row 8, I have some sort of gauge that measures the car. Not sure what part of the car it's measuring, perhaps weight?

Finally, I'm not sure what the icon is in the third column, fourth from the bottom. Looks like some kind of punch card reader? :dunno:

Maybe I should just start pulling fuses until the socket goes dark....
3rd row second from bottom

looks like the universal glyf for dc power supply
I think the symbols are kinda cool. Those Germans think of everything! Particularly that they don't want you to know what the h...... is going on in your car. Most of the symbols can be interpreted (somewhat). Have you looked in the Owner's manual to see if you can cross reference the symbols to symbols used in the manual (or on the car). Teutonic thinking. I suspect the rectangle in the first column is the nav screen display, why else would it need all those fuses?

The diagrams do say which fuses (s) are for what, just instead of words they use symbols. Most of Europes signage is based on symbology. I am going to download the manual to see if there is a relationship.

Followup: I checked the manual, and alot of the symbols are explained there, but I don't know that all of them are. Third row, second from bottom is best guess at ports, but don't know, one of them is 20 amp. Alot of others can be ruled out as symbols seem straightforward. GOOD LUCK.
Well, rather than blow my brain trying to figure out the wiring schematics of this car, I decided to hell with it, I was going to just plug in the pump.

I am happy to say that the trunk outlet, the cup-holder outlet and the center console outlet all flow more than 15 amps as each was able to power the pump without blowing a fuse.

Fuse layout with descriptions.

Scroll down to the 2nd reply by whatheheck in this thread.

It takes awhile for the page to load.

Click on the diagrams to enlarge them.
Good attempt, but me thinks some of his guesses are pretty far off the mark.
Fuse layout with descriptions.

Scroll down to the 2nd reply by whatheheck in this thread.

It takes awhile for the page to load.

Click on the diagrams to enlarge them.
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